Dealing transition has always been hard for me. Especially when one has grown so comfortable and settled in it.
As I looked back in the mere years I have came, now in my mid twenties, there were numerous transition I had to go through. From a teenager to a soldier, from a soldier back to a student and young working adult, full of hope to conquer the corporate ladder.
Still, while I thought the transition in vocational sense was hard, I was not expecting there to be a bigger giant I had to overcome. The transition of very life itself. The mid twenties is truly a confusing time, if not for me then for everyone else as well.
I bear no answer to this, honestly. On one end, it is the stage where some around me had already achieved financial freedom, some are still living life carefree as though high school never ended. But this post is not about the comparison of my salary against my peer. It is about what I treasure most in my heart. The people around me.
I've always placed such great hope and trust in the close friends I chosen around me. But what I was not ready was the transition that we all go through. I cannot bear the thought that one day these friendship will change, transitioned and become something else entirely. The ending of my short relationship with my ex-girlfriend made me realise it is possible to go from stranger to stranger, with just the addition of memories that increasingly does not mean anything.
Like a paper cut on my heart, the very friends that I find comfort and trust in, will one day come to their own commitment of spouse and life. In a dark way, I will increasingly play less role in their life and theirs in mine. This transition, truly I am not ready for. The joy and fun that we have today, will not last and will never be the same in the next few short years.
Somehow, I feel so tired of life and I am fearful to face what it will throw at me next. As James Dashner puts it aptly, "If Life is a disease, then Death must be the cure".
